Scott: Well, she does… I’m just… I don’t… I don’t have any suggestions, so why don’t we let Helen do it? Helen can do it today and I do it for a lot more days until I can’t think, then I ask Helen.
Okay. Helen, what do you want to talk about?
Helen: Eh… Eh… Scott.
Scott: Why do you have to talk about me?
What do you want to talk about?
Helen: Scott.
Scott: Really.
Helen: Yeah.
Okay, what about Scott.
Helen: Eh… He’s annoying.
Scott: Do you have to say that in front of the whole world?
Helen: And he’s silly… And he’s… Em… He annoys me.
Scott: Do you have to say that in front of the whole world, Toot?
Do you also like him?
Helen: Yeah.
Why?
Helen: Because he’s so funny.
Do you like Helen, Scott?
Scott: Well, to be honest, it’s like Tom and Jerry – sometimes we do and sometimes we don’t. When I don’t like her she’s annoying. Bonkers pinhead brainless, has no brains, lost her eyes and does the most bonkers things in the world.
Helen: What colour is a burp? Burple.
Scott: See – told you she does the most bonkers things in the whole world.
They drink milk and they take your pants away – anything else?
Helen: What else? Eh… steal your book of costumes. Then they steal your hairspray. Aliens can be quite mischiefy when they’re in your room and take all your pants away. All aliens love underpants. There’s lots of aliens and aliens love underpants. And showers.
Okay, that’s enough about aliens – what about Scott?
Helen: Eh… he might like lying on the alien?
Do you like Scott?
Helen: Yes – very, very much.
Why?
Helen: Because he likes me.
So you just like him because he likes you?
Helen: Yeah.
Is he funny?
Helen: Yeah, and he makes jokes.
What’s the funniest joke he’s told you?
Helen: I think he told me: how dogs sniff, fine but they’ve actually got a bath. But I might tell Scott dogs eat aliens.
Scott: Do they? I didn’t even know aliens existed.
Helen: Aliens live under… I was going to say to Scott aliens love underpants and they exist. Then they wash themselves in the bath. And dogs and aliens have a shower.
That’s silly.
Helen: Yeah.
Is there anything else you’d like to say?
Helen: No.
Nothing?
Helen: No, because I’d like to talk about everything else, like… eh… swimming pools?
Scott: If I’m right or wrong, it might have been Mario 64.
What was that like?
Scott: Hmm. Well. It’s like… The best thing about it was running towards yourself. It’s incredible. The Bobomb game was good – you could throw the big Bobomb up and down.
Is that your favourite Mario?
Scott: No, no it is not.
What is?
Scott: The game after it, Super Mario Sunshine.
Why do you like that so much?
Scott: Well, because of… Instead of power-ups, there’s nozzles. The double-up nozzle where you keep a hold of the ‘R’ button and go ‘Nnnnnnnn – POW’ – it’s worth wasting water for.
What about the Mario games on the Wii?
Scott: The Wii games best was… just let me say Super Mario Brothers Wii. But Mario Brothers DS is good as well.
They’re both better than Super Mario Galaxy 1 and 2?
Scott: Brothers DS and Sunshine definitely can be.
What is your favourite Mario moment?
Scott: In Mario Brothers Wii, when you’re walking up on the top of the grass and you’re just above it all and can see your legs – you really need Yoshi for it. You get from World 1 to World 5.
Why do you think Mario is so popular?
Scott: Because he’s like the running, jumping star of the show usually. He’s the star of Mario Kart, Donkey Kong. I’d just like to say, Donkey Kong was the first Mario game ever. He’s been so popular because he’s usually the running, jumping star of the show, but if he isn’t… He’s been so popular because there’s been lots of sales for him. Maybe not a lot, but a lot by Nintendo. He’s always been the star of the show.
Some of the gang - but Mario's the star of the show.
Luigi is his brother – does he have any other family?
Scott: Wario might be his cousin. Waluigi might be his other cousin. Do you know who Liam would be?
Who’s Liam?
Scott: Liam is like one of the ones that in hardly any Mario games at all.
What games is he in?
Scott: He might be in Mario Kart Wii. Mario Kart DS there’s a bit more chance.
What does he look like?
Scott: He’s like Luigi except a bit bluer instead of green.
And he’s related to Mario?
Scott: He’s still a Mario character, yes – he’s playable. I asked Ross at school who Blueigi was for real and he said it was Liam.
Has Mario got a mum and a dad?
Scott: That’s a hard one… Let’s just go and find out about Liam…
View the clip below to see a rare appearance of the mysterious Liam. According to Scott, he’s the blue guy who appears a minute and a half in…
It’s nothing terribly grand. It aims to do exactly what it says on the tin – what the world is like when you’re seven.
I always enjoy the insights my seven-year-old son Scott has on the world. It’s refreshing and entertaining to see the world through his eyes. Sometimes it’s odd, sometimes it’s funny and sometimes it’s incredibly insightful – but it’s always interesting to get his take on things.
I’ve been thinking for a while that I’d like to collect his thoughts together in one place. I find them interesting, and I hope others do too.
I’ve been mulling over for a while the best way to do it. Do I craft it like prose? Let him do it himself? In the end, I settled for a Q&A discussion. It seemed more honest that way, like listening in on a two-way conversation.
Well, not always a two-way conversation – sometimes it’s three-way. His three-year-old sister is often there while Scott and I are chatting and she usually can’t resist chipping in.
Let’s see how it goes – this is all pretty new to me.
The blog is still under construction. I need to get some content on – we’re on the case – and smarten up the appearance. Who knows, I might even ask Scott to illustrate some of the articles.
We’ll be wrestling with some big issues – life, love, loss and toys – over the next few days. I suspect Lego, Super Mario and Nintendo will also feature heavily.
So please be kind to us as we take our first tentative steps into the big, scary world of blogging…
scottandhisthoughts 